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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
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