Jerry, you need to find god
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize