so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
naw, they were rude, not me.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing