the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
