these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Found the puke drawer
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
