who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
