they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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