i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize