in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Randomize
