I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
i think im in europe. pls send help
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Randomize
