Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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