There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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