i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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