1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize