We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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