Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
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