I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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