butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
What did we do last night that was yellow?
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
