so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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