You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize
