You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
