Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
