I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Drunk is not a location!
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??