I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize