i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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