After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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