im drinking this country out of the recession.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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