Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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