After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
