When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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