i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
