yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize
