I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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