Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
