Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
