Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
