Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
