sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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