i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize
