its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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