I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize