Cold hands, warm shart.
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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