But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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