***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
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i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
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apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I'm too high and old for this...
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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