Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize