Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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