i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
