I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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