Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
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