So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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